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MKaku Chat

Nicki's Corner


Nicki's Corner

    Well here we are!!!  I've got a lot to talk about, so if you don't like long winded speeches I suggest you leave now! Not really sure exactly what all i'm gonna be saying here so just be patient and hang on for the ride, I promise it'll be a long one this time. With all that said, let's get started shall we?

    As most of you know i've been on irc for a long time now, never in all that time did i really make great friends with other's, *at least I didn't think so* untill the past year, ofc i guess you have to open the door and let others in to do that huh?  I'd like to say here to a very special few I am proud to call you all friends some even more so than others, i would be hard put to name you I honestly hope i don't have to, that you know of whom i speak. If you don't then you will of this I can assure you before long you will.

    In life as well as in irc most all of us have a wish and desire of doing something special, of leaving our mark you could say... in this I hope mine was accomplished with BService, that if nothing else it can be said I did one good thing in life, something that mattered, that made an impact on something and on others.

    I know most think me a bitch if not a cold bitch at that, well guess what! I'm not going to apologize for any of that or the way I am, you either liked me or you didn't, damn simple huh? At least I didn't play some fucking two faced bitch with other's!!!! I tried to let EVERYONE know exactly where they stood with me, I never did like to have other's guessing as to if we were friends or not. Another reason I stated earlier that you knew who you were that I was referring to!!!

    As I am sure many of you know by now, if you don't then you are blind and stupid... I love terri{N} with all that I am, she is the most important thing in my life and for the record i've never ever loved anyone as I love her...but then we've loved one another many times in the past throughout history as we shall again after this life. Unfortunately I must leave soon...something I am finding it very hard to do...but it's getting harder and harder to fight what is happening to me.

    Most everyone knows my problem and illness, I want to say for the record that I am sorry for my moods at times lately, I have absolutely no control over any of it... I hope you understand...if not well I guess that's ok too. I'll not dwell on that aspect any longer here, this isn't what this umm what would you call this? is about anyway. *Turn the page*

    Back to terri the keeper of my heart and soul......

terri oh my darling what can i say that we haven't said a million times before??  I LOVE YOU!!!! is first three simple words that don't seem to relay what and how I truely feel about you...i'm not sure there are words for it in the english language?  Regardless of that you know the depth of my love for you...it has the passion of many lives behind it our love is grows stronger with each one. There's so much I want to say and now all of a sudden as I sit here fingers hovering over the keyboard keys my minds a blank *sigh* oh well we have a little time it will all come to me i'm sure of that.

... to be continued ...

In Loving Memory of Nicki
(July 19, 1973 - December 15, 1999)

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